The Confident/Cocky Conundrum

There's little more attractive than a person who exudes confidence. You don't have to look like a supermodel in order to turn heads when you walk into a room-if you convey a sense of healthy self-esteem, people are naturally intrigued and want to know more about you. It can all backfire, however, if you turn skip past healthy self-esteem into unhealthy cockiness. If you come off as cocky or arrogant, prospective suitors are going to stay away.

Cockiness is a huge turn-off in the dating world. While meekness or insecurity can make sparking up a conversation tricky, there's little that is less attractive than a person who thinks that the world revolves around her. Why would someone want to get to know someone who seems to think she is always right or the most important person in a room? When you are on the search for Mr. Right, it is important to know how to walk the fine line between confidence and cockiness, so that you aren't sending unintentional signals to a prospective date.

Accept a compliment gracefully
This should be an easy concept: when someone pays you a compliment, smile and say thank you. Simple, right? Many people would say no.

There is a common fear that that gracefully accepting a compliment automatically means that you are going to sound conceited, but it's when you go over the top that insincerity and cockiness sets in. If someone compliments your hair, don't respond by talking about how much you spent on your latest cut or that the stylist also works with a celebrity client. You might think that you are passing off the praise, but it reads as if you are trying to liken yourself to that higher-profile person. Instead, say that you appreciate the compliment and that you are flattered that he noticed your style.

Balance the conversation
When someone is talking to a person to whom she is attracted, it is easy to either let him do all the talking or inadvertently commandeer the conversation. If you are more of a talker, make sure to pause from telling him all about your life and inquire about his story. You do, after all, want to learn about the guy. Asking questions about him will not only convey your interest, but it will also make it clear that you don't think that you are the only person who matters in the exchange.

Showcase your sociability
If you've spotted someone across the room who has perked your interest, it never hurts to show that you are have good social graces. If you have friends with you, make a point of showcasing your social skills. Engage in conversation, again making a point to balance those conversations so as not to appear overly self-centered. Assume that he could be looking at you at any moment; if you are happy and having a good time with people who clearly enjoy your company, he will feel more tempted to approach you when you make yourself available for a few moments of alone time.

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