Single Parent Dating

If you've just started dating someone with a child or children, their family-and their ex-will have an impact on your relationship, and you'll need to know what to expect. As long as you are comfortable with getting to know the person you're dating and her family, you can avoid feeling overwhelmed by single parent dating.

The Complications of Single Parent Dating
There's at least one child and an ex to deal with, for starters. Even though you are facing your own emotional challenges, try to look at the situation from the perspective of the person you are dating. Dating for single parents is even more difficult than it is for you: They have a child to care for, an ex to keep relations civil with and worries over how you feel about everything.

You need to be honest about your fears. If you're nervous about meeting your date's child, talk about it so the two of you can come up with a plan of action. Additionally, don't be scared about asking about your partner's past. The more information you know about why the previous relationship ended and what it is like now, the less chance there is that you'll end up blindsided.

The Ex Will Most Likely Be Around
If you are dating a single parent, not only will you have to deal with their child or children but also with the ex. Now, the ex may not necessarily be around all of the time, but the kids are bound to mention their other parent, and you need to be ready for this. As long as you go into the situation with the expectation that the ex will be around and involved, you can relieve yourself of some awkwardness and can prepare yourself mentally.

When meeting the ex, remember to act friendly. Remember that the ex might be as worried about you as you are about the ex. Plus, this is not a competition. If the children talk about their other parent, don't try to change the subject or dismiss what they say. Even if the ex has done some not-so-great things in the past, they are still involved in your date's family.

Your Date Will Have Less Time
Single parents have a full schedule: They have to juggle work, children, chores and a new love. Be patient when it comes to asking for your loved one's time. Try to have a regular date time each week, but be prepared for last-minute cancellations. Their children may be ill, or they may have a school function to attend, among other things.

When planning dates or surprises, keep in mind that your partner's schedule may not be as flexible as your own, either. They will have to find babysitters and negotiate work schedules. If you are understanding, you will show your partner that you respect their life, and you will also avoid feelings of disappointment or anger if your plans don't end up like you'd hoped.

Meeting the Kids
Meeting your partner's kids for the first time will give rise to mixed feelings. The children may be excited that they mom has found someone special, but they may also feel resentment because they feel as if they have to be loyal to their other parent. Follow your partner's lead when it comes to meeting the kids, and don't push the meeting. Your loved one will know when the time is right.

Go into this situation with realistic expectations. It's likely that the kids either won't like you or won't show that they like you at first. Before meeting the kids, find out as much about them as possible so you can start conversations. Keep the meeting low-key and short: a dinner meeting or ice-cream trip will give you the chance to meet without feeling as if you have to bond immediately. No matter what, stay friendly, even if the children act out.

You may be well-intentioned, but you don't want to give them elaborate gifts right away, as these could be seen as bribes. You should try to bring something to the meeting place, such as dessert for dinner, but choose a present that everyone in the group can enjoy.

Always follow-up with your loved one about how the kids took to you, how you performed and what you could do better. If you're meeting the kids, chances are that this relationship is serious. Consequently, you want to not only build a relationship with your loved one but also with their children.

Make Sure to Have Private Time
Bonding with your partner's children is great, but the two of you need some private time. When you have openings on your calendar, go on dates that involve just the two of you. Since you don't want to be overly lovey-dovey in front of the kids, this is your time to let loose and talk about your lives and your relationship.