Most of us tend to think of friends and lovers as two very different camps. But the worlds of romance and friendship aren’t as far apart as you might think. Often, your choice of best friend says a lot about what you’re really looking for in a mate. So next time you’re thinking about what you want from a romantic partner, think about your BFF—and think about the qualities he or she has. You’re friends for a reason. Whether your pal is the life of the party or the big sibling you never had, chances are this person has a special quality that reflects what you need from a mate.

“If you have a good relationship with your best friend, it’s a good indicator that you can be that intimate with another person,” says Lauren Zander, a relationship expert at the Handel Group, a private and corporate coaching firm. “It shows that you can be that close, that loving—and that you can care that much about another person. If you can do that in a friendship, you can do it in a relationship.”

Take a look at these types — they’re bound to look familiar! — and see what Zander has to say about them.

1. The Life of the Party
Who the friend is: Also known as the Good Time Girl/Guy, this best friend is like a thousand-watt light bulb. Simply put, this person makes everything fun—whether you’re at work, at a New Year’s bash or waiting at a bus station. This BFF has an energy and appetite for fun anytime, anyplace, and you love ’em for it.

What kind of romance works for you: “This can be a tricky dynamic, dating someone this full of energy” says Zander. “It can offer so much, but you want to make sure that your partner is still interested in you when the spotlight is off him.” In other words, the Life of the Party can be a great deal of fun and add a lot of adventure to your life—as long as your sweetie isn’t just looking for an eager audience. “I see a lot of marriages that are founded on this, but you want to make sure both of you has a solid identity, and that it’s not all about the more dominant person.”

2. The Polar Opposite
Who the friend is: If you only had a nickel for every time someone asked, “How can you two be friends?” You’re the first to admit it—this pal has virtually nothing in common with you, but for whatever reason, the two of you get on with each other like a house on fire. It’s a classic case of opposites attracting, each one of you allowing the other to experiment with a totally different lifestyle and viewpoint.

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