There are numerous ways to break up with your girlfriend. Some are considerate and polite, others will likely leave her in tears. Regardless of any negativity you might feel toward your significant other, it is best to break up as amicably as possible.
The good news is that however you decide to break up with your girlfriend, you are not likely to leave a permanent scar. Some studies suggest that many are able to recover from failed relationships within a matter of weeks, and that stress levels aren't nearly as high as once believed following a breakup.
Still, you should break up with your girlfriend without intentionally hurting her feelings or destroying her self esteem. Remember that women talk to one another, and the way you treat one woman might impact how easily you get your next date.
It's All About You
Break-up conversations are never fun, but you can make it easier on her by turning the tables. Rather than listing all of her flaws, use "I" statements to convey your unhappiness. This is one of the best ways to break up with your girlfriend because she doesn't feel like she's done something wrong.
You might say, "I'm not ready for a serious relationship" or "I need some time for myself." Just stay clear of the age old line, "It's not you, it's me." She's unlikely to believe that, and you'll just make her feel worse about the whole situation. When you break up with your girlfriend, you can avoid anger and depression by talking about how you feel-about the relationship, not about her.
Bring a Doctor's Note
It's doubtful that you've considered a medical opinion when brainstorming ways to break up with your girlfriend, but stranger things have happened. Millions of people see mental health professionals every year, and your relationship might be causing you undue stress. If this is the case, tell your girlfriend the recommendation of your physician.
This doesn't mean that you should blame the breakup entirely on your doctor. However, you can use his or her opinions about your mental health to bolster your position. Say, "My doctor believes that I'm depressed because I'm not happy in this relationship. I agree with him." Then reassure her that she hasn't done anything to deserve your mental state.
Go on the Offensive
If you truly believe that your girlfriend is the reason for all of your relationship troubles, you might want to go on the offensive. This means laying bare all of the things she does that drive you crazy, then making it clear beyond a shadow of a doubt that it's over. This is probably one of the cruelest ways to break up with your girlfriend, but sometimes it is necessary.
For example, if you think that a kind, polite message will not get through, you might not have a choice. Some women (and men, for that matter) are incapable of accepting reason, and will argue a point until both parties are exhausted. You can eliminate the back and forth when you break up with your girlfriend by being straight from the beginning.
Although you won't find this breakup advice in most magazines, it is definitely a thorough way to break up with your girlfriend. If you have had an affair or if you've told a lie, admit it to your significant other. If you don't grovel at her feet or admit remorse, she's unlikely to take you back.
Admitting an affair or lie is an indirect way to break up with your girlfriend, but it works. In this case, you avoid emotional scenes for the most part, and she'll probably be the one to utter the words "it's over." Keep in mind that this method will probably hurt her feelings and put a black mark next to your name in her book forever.
Pack Your Bags
Nothing signals a breakup quite like packing everything you own. If you and your significant other share living space, simply pack all of your belongings and set them by the front door. When she gets home, it won't be difficult to infer your intentions. When you break up with your girlfriend this way, though, prepare for some backlash.
When you pack your bags, you send a nonverbal message that will likely lead to a fight. Your best bet in this case is to simply leave, particularly if you and your girlfriend haven't gotten along in some time. Chances are she knew this day was coming, so sever ties immediately and for good.
When It's Over
There are plenty of ways to break up with your girlfriend, but you're the only one who knows what breakup advice will work for you. Just remember that your significant other, regardless of how annoying or clingy or possessive she might be, is a person worthy of your respect.
The best thing you can do is make a clean break and wish her the best. After that, it's time to get on with your life and see what else awaits you in the future.