Why Shacking Up Before You Get Married Is a Good Idea

Couples are more reluctant than ever to take the final steps in getting married. Whether they are crazy in love or just seem right for each other, saying those wedding vows that will bind them to each other for life is a risk fewer couples are willing to take. Couples offer the following reasons for why shacking up before you get married is a good idea.

You don't really know someone until you live with the person

Dating someone a few times a week with an occasional sleepover may give you an idea of his or her personality, but it doesn't show you what it's like to live with the person on a day-to-day basis.

Little things make a difference

When you live with someone 24/7, you get to experience firsthand how the person handles stress, disappointment, anger, and life in general. For some, those little flaws might be endearing, while for others they could become major obstacles.

Avoid taking each other for granted

Others prefer shacking up before marriage because it keeps both partners on their toes. Once married, a lot of men and women feel they have it made and develop a careless attitude overnight. They relax to the point that their partners no longer recognizes the person they dated. They may quit their job, put on weight, or generally no longer take care of themselves. By living together, especially in the early stages, there is always the chance of the other calling it quits. Living with that danger keeps the relationship fresher.

When children and family are in the mix

If one or both partners have children, shacking up before you get married may be a good idea. The adults may love each other, but can they tolerate each other's offspring? It worked for the Brady bunch, but it may not work for you if the kids don't get along which, in turn, puts stress on your relationship.

The same could apply to extended family members. You and your partner may get along perfectly, but inconsiderate parents and difficult siblings could sour the deal.

Are you sexually compatibility?

You might love each other dearly, but are you sexually compatible? While you may have tested the waters already, dating sex and relationship sex are two different things. Your partner's needs may be different from yours over the long haul, or you may discover some unusual requests that you may or may not like.

Maintaining a healthy and compatible sex life over the long term becomes a challenge for all couples. Shacking up before you get married can be a good barometer of how your sex life will mature if you remain together.

Financial compatibility

Another issue is financially compatibility. She may be addicted to shoe shopping, while he may be hardcore thrifty. When you live with someone, it becomes more difficult for the person to hide his or her money habits.

Lower exit costs if the relationship fails

Probably the biggest reason why shacking up before you get married is so popular, is because if the relationship doesn't work out, no divorce is needed. With no lawyers or alimony in the mix, the couple can walk away with a clean slate without spilling the type of financial or emotional blood that usually happens during a divorce.

Most people don't buy a car without taking it for a test drive first. Before making a legal and spiritual commitment to another person, many couples today are opting to go slow and take that all-important test drive first.

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