If you want to be secure in any relationship, you must first be secure with yourself. Lack of self confidence can destroy a relationship and affect every aspect of social life. Self esteem is an important factor in making any relationship secure.
All relationships involve two people, both of whom must possess self confidence to balance out the security of the relationship. A loving, committed, secure relationship is achieved when both parties are not dependent on the other. A secure relationship is accomplished by having someone to share life with, not having someone to live life through.
Everyone has a different personality and some are easily hurt while others are stronger and more self-assured. Striving to be more independent while at the same time showing compassion and love to your partner will make both parties stronger and more secure. Insecurity is often brought on by past hurts. Striving to overcome these setbacks and learning to let them go will accomplish a much more secure relationship in the future.
Communication, as always, plays a huge role in any relationship. Listening to your partner and learning how to communicate will provide a much stronger sense of security. Relationships which have high levels of communication are extremely secure and committed. Learning to communicate will provide everyone with a sense of wholeness and security.
Co-dependence is fatal to relationships. Try to find security in yourself and learn to not rely on someone else to make your feel secure. Independence in a relationship is a key factor t security and a long lasting commitment. A huge factor towards achieving a lasting, secure relationship is the ability to feel loyalty based on obvious actions. Requiring constant verbal re-affirmation of commitment will soon lead to a dissolving relationship.
Self confidence will play a huge role in achieving a secure relationship. If you are insecure about loyalty and have trust issues, this can be the beginning of the end to any relationship. Trust must be given openly and when trust is abused it must be dealt with by abandoning the relationship. A long term commitment is only valuable when trust is easy to supply and earned by both parties.
Wouldn't it be nice if there were literally visible red flags in a relationship? If things weren't quite right, a red flag would pop out. It would be a dead give-away that there is an impending relationship problem. There would be no guessing or needless paranoia because it would all be there in black and white (or red).
If you're interested in resolving relationship trust issues, you may find these suggestions helpful.