Trying to figure out the best time to broach a touchy topic, ask your guy a favor or convince him to do something you know he'll dread? Well, it's easier than you think if you learn how to tune in to his body clock, says Gabrielle Lichterman, founder of Hormonology.info and co-author of 28 Days: What Your Cycle Reveals About Your Love Life, Moods, and Potential. While women, we all know, experience hormone-induced mood swings on a monthly basis, Lichterman attests that men, too, are affected by hormonal highs and lows-only their levels fluctuate daily. Want to work get his hormones working for you? Read on.
If you need his help moving, fighting, or fixing something…
Ask: from 9-12 a.m.
It should come as no surprise that guys wake up bursting with testosterone. And aside from the obvious frisky factor, this surge in hormones makes him ambitious and determined, says Lichterman. This is the perfect time to ask him for a favor, particularly one that makes him feel like Mr. Fix-It. Buying a car? Indulge his competitive streak, and drag him along to help you haggle with the salesman and score a great deal. Or, cash in on his peak in spatial thinking and ask him to move your couch, or measure your closet space. He'll feel heroic, and you'll reap the benefits.
If you want to get him to agree to your plans…
Ask: from 3-4 p.m.
Trying to convince him to sign up for ballroom dancing lessons, commit to your new book club or otherwise agree to do something that would normally send men screaming in the opposite direction? Then this late-afternoon window is the perfect opportunity, says Lichterman, since his super-low testosterone levels will make him mellow and amenable to pretty much anything you throw on the table.
If you want to broach a touchy topic…
Ask: from 8-10 p.m.
At this hour, another hormone called oxytocin - a.k.a. the "cuddle hormone" due to its intimacy-inducing effects - is on the rise in his bloodstream, says Lichterman. That means this is a prime time to resolve a lingering spat ("It hurt my feelings when you didn't call today") or get a grievance off your chest ("Will you please shave your goatee?"). You'll probably get met with nothing but a sincere apology and the promise to change his ways. Sure, his sweetness may be as much due to timing as a true desire to please, but hey, who cares as long as your wish is his command?
Elise Nersesian has written for Redbook, Stuff, and other publications.
Wouldn't it be nice if there were literally visible red flags in a relationship? If things weren't quite right, a red flag would pop out. It would be a dead give-away that there is an impending relationship problem. There would be no guessing or needless paranoia because it would all be there in black and white (or red).
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