Cold Hands: How to Overcome Wedding Toast Stage Fright

So your best bud is getting married and he's picked you as his right hand man. You've got your tux on, your cummerbund tightened to an uncomfortable level, you've ushered everyone to their proper places, watched your friend say his "I do" to his lovely new wife. Now it's off to the reception where all eyes will now be on you for your touching toast.

Gulp.

Take a deep breath, best man. You are not alone in your public speaking fears. In fact most people hate addressing large crowds, especially at such an important moment. Just stay calm. With these helpful hints, you'll get you past your anxiety and on to your chicken or fish plate without a hiccup.

Practice, Practice, Practice
Perhaps the most important thing to do is to come prepared. Before the big day, outline what you plan to say on the public speaker's best friend, the almighty index card. It is not necessary to write everything you plan on saying down, just the key points - maybe an anecdote about how the groom admitted to you that his wife was the one for him. Keep the index cards on the table or in the palm of your hand and use them just for reference. You want it appear as the speech is coming from the heart, which it should be, not a piece of paper.

Keep It Short and Sweet
While you don't want to say too little, you certainly don't want to drag it out. There's no need to reenact the Gettysburg Address. Remember you've got a bunch of hungry guests wondering when they get to chow down. A couple minutes is all that is necessary. Time it out ahead of time by practicing in front of a mirror with a stop watch.

Stress the sweet. This is not a Dean Martin roast and while you can use humor, Don Rickles-esque zingers have no place at a wedding. A light-hearted jab with a sentimental ending is probably best.

Liquid Courage
Have a drink and relax. Alcohol is definitely a social lubricant - a drink to ease the nerves might do you some good. If alcohol is not your thing, use a relaxation technique such as taking slow steady deep breathes.

That said, it is crucial that you do not get drunk. Slurring words will not only embarrass yourself, but the bride and groom as well - you don't want to remembered as the guy who ruined the wedding by spilling wine all over dear, sweet Aunt Edna.

So there you have it: come prepared, keep it short and sweet, and relax. If you make a mistake or stumble over your words, remember it's not a big deal. Just correct yourself and keep going. People are there for the bride and groom, not to judge you - unless you plan on breaking out the Worm on the dance floor. At that point, you're asking to be judged!