A wedding should be a joyous occasion, but planning it can be difficult. For example, there are many positions to be filled by family members, but if you have two fathers, then you could end up with a sticky situation when it comes to filling the Father of the Bride position and traditions. However, if you're honest with yourself and with your family, you can avoid unnecessary blow-ups or hurt feelings.
First of all, decide who you want to walk you down the aisle. This is the main Father of the Bride duty - the giving away of the bride - and it's something that may or may not be important to the men in your life, whether you're talking about your biological father or a stepfather or some other father-like figure in your life. You'll know in your gut to whom you are closest. Do not allow other people to pressure you into a decision about this. This is your day and it is your decision. You should not settle when it comes to your wedding day.
Once you've made your decision about who will walk you down the aisle, you can then assign the other father to a different task: he can be the one to dance with you during the daughter-father dance or he can be the first to give a toast during the event. This way, the other father still has a role in your wedding and will not be as hurt.
If you do not have a close relationship with one or both of your fathers, realize that you do not have to have a man walk you down the aisle or have a father-daughter dance. You can personalize your wedding to fit your tastes. You can have a friend give you away or you can give yourself away. You can do without the father-daughter dance if you do not want to choose between your two fathers or if you are not close to them.
Whatever you decide, be sure to talk to both fathers before the event. If you choose not to incorporate the fathers in the wedding, explain that you wanted a modern wedding without these traditions and that you did not want to choose between the two men. If you decide that one will give you away and one will dance with you, explain the reasons behind this decision.
 | The duties of the father of the bride extend far beyond walking his daughter down the aisle. Not only is he often in charge of paying for the wedding, but he also provides the entertainment with the night's first speech and the father-daughter dance. |
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 | Traditionally, the dance between the bride and groom is followed by a dance between the bride and her father. The father-daughter wedding dance is a nice way of marking the shift from child to adult, and it is thought to be an important part of wedding etiquette. |
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